July 14
July 14.
It’s time to celebrate.
Some people think that this day commemorates Bastille Day.
And it does.
But it is also National Pandemonium Day.
Which makes perfect sense.
Because it’s also National Nude Day.
As well as National Tape Measure Day.
I mean, come on, if nude people are running around with tape measures, then pandemonium is the only logical outcome.
I feel sorry for the people trying to celebrate Bastille Day.
These other celebrations will be nothing but a distraction.
I plan on spending the day at home, fully clothed, eating mac and cheese.
Because it’s also National Macaroni and Cheese Day.
I’m exhausted.
July 14 is such a busy day.
Tomorrow is National Be A Dork Day.
Finally, a day to relax and be myself.
Liz Brenner
Everyone has a story to tell.
Even you.
Especially you.
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