Mostly True Memoirs
THE PROTOCOL FOR UNATTENDED BANANAS
At the airport, there are constant announcements.
They tell you to wear a mask.
They tell you to socially distance yourself.
They tell you to watch out for unattended baggage.
But they don’t tell you the protocol for unattended bananas.
I felt kind of bad when I saw it abandoned on a seat at the gate.
Someone paid a small fortune for an airport banana, and then they left it behind.
Eventually a woman came by and joyfully exclaimed something in another language.
“Oh THERE’s my banana!” is what I imagined she said.
She picked it up.
And then she dropped it while she continued to rush through the terminal.
Again, I didn’t know the protocol.
Should I chase after her?
Should I alert security?
Should I make a fruit salad?
They called my flight, so I had to go.
I’ll always be a little bit bothered that I don’t know how this story ends.