Connection Is So Much More Important Than Perfection

I’m an English teacher.
I teach children and adults.
Native speakers and non-native speakers.
ESL, communication, and creative writing.

The one thing that holds up most students in both subjects?
Their obsession with perfection.

But perfection shouldn’t be the goal.
Perfect English is stiff, unnatural, and, frankly, a little boring.
It’s not how people really talk.
And it’s not how people truly form a connection.

You wouldn’t know that by the number of grammar police patrolling the internet.

Yes, some grammar rules are non-negotiable.
Capitalize the first word in a sentence.
Use punctuation at the end.
Period.

But other rules?
They’re more flexible.

I’ve been teaching English for years.
I’m an avid reader. A word jockey.
But I still can’t, for the life of me, figure out the difference between affect and effect.

One’s a noun, one’s a verb.
Except when they swap roles and the one’s a verb and the other one’s a noun.
Gahhh!
My brain just can’t.

So I go to great lengths never to use either one. That’s my solution.

One of my ESL students once told me about a squirrel who stole his lunch in the park.
He couldn’t remember the word squirrel, so he called it a “tree rat with a big tail.”
I knew exactly what he meant.

I tried to help him pronounce squirrel.
It didn’t go well.
Finally, I said, “You know what? Maybe this word doesn’t really matter. How often does anyone actually use the word squirrel anyway?”

And, truthfully, the ‘tree rat’ version of the story was funnier than the ‘squirrel’ version.

Don’t waste your precious energy on one tricky thing.
Focus on communicating clearly in general.

This same advice applies equally to speaking and to writing.
Writers often get tangled up trying to craft the perfect sentence or find the perfect word.
But stories, like people, are more interesting with a few rough edges.

Once, I told a story that mentioned Fireball whiskey.
Afterward, someone pulled me aside and scolded me.
“I thought you were an English teacher,” they admonished me.
“Why did you use sloppy language?”

Yes, I did use sloppy language.  

On purpose.
A story about whiskey told in perfectly polished prose would have sounded ridiculous.
Whiskey needs a little grit.
I used poor grammar for effect.
Or was it affect?

Either way – it worked.

Remember this about communication:
The goal isn’t perfection.
The goal is connection.

Don’t let the hard stuff stop you from expressing yourself.
Focus on confidence, clarity, and creativity.

You’ve got this.
And if you’d like a little help along the way, I teach short, friendly, microlearning sessions in English, communication, and creative writing.

Each workshop is designed to build your confidence, not your anxiety.

No grammar police.
No red pens.
Just real connection.