Mostly True Memoirs

OF COURSE HE CAN’T FIND IT
“Do we have any mayo?” The Husband shouted from the kitchen.
“Yes, I just bought some,” I hollered back.
“Where is it?”
“If it’s not in the pantry, then it’s in the fridge.”
“I can’t find it.”
I sighed.
Of course he can’t find it.
I grumbled under my breath and trudged into the kitchen to find it.
He knows the drill.
If I find the thing in five seconds, I get to punch him as hard as I can.
He’s lucky that I’m all talk and no action.
So far.