At the grocery store, a very, very, very old man was getting a cart out of the cart corral.
He was moving very, very, very slowly.
I wondered if I should help him.
But maybe he would be insulted.
He finally, finally, finally got his cart, but he saw that I was waiting, so he gave it to me.
And then he started back on his very, very, very slow trek to get another cart.
I felt guilty.
I should be helping him.
I shouldn’t be letting him help me.
I said, “Thank you, Sir.”
His face lit up with an enormous smile.
Maybe I did help him after all.
The newest insulin pump technology is amazing.
And a little scary.
And very expensive.
But mostly amazing.
And just like that, my baby has turned 20.
He was born in the final, waning days of 1999.
He loved to lord over his classmates that he wasn’t just a few weeks or a few months older than them, or a year older, or even a decade or a century older.
No, he was an entire millennium older than everyone else.
These are awesome bragging rights for all kids born in December of 1999.
And he still sometimes opens conversations with, “Back in the 90s…”
Because he was there.
For a couple of days.
Happy birthday, Kiddo.
I’m proud to be your Mama.
I took a quiz to find out who likes me.
The entire family laughed heartily.
“No one likes you,” they chortled.
I took the quiz.
“No one likes you.”
My ESL student told me that she got a traffic ticket.
For driving on the sidewalk.
On the sidewalk?
Was she on a bicycle?
No, she was in her car.
There was a lot of traffic.
And she was in a hurry.
As long as there was a good reason.
I had never had mulled wine before.
It’s the drink that Clarence the angel ordered in It’s A Wonderful Life.
In the movie, Nick the bartender got annoyed.
So of course I had to try the mulled wine.
I had to see what was so annoying about this drink.
It turns out that mulled wine is simply hot sangria.
Not bad, Clarence, not bad.
Nick needs to chill.
I sat down to play with the dog, and I noticed that the floor was gross and could really use a mop.
It kinda made me regret playing with the dog.
HAHA just kidding!
I never regret playing with the dog.
Mopping the floor, however, is nothing but a crushing disappointment.
My sons are grown.
I thought I was well past that stage in my life where I find weird items in odd places.
Today I found a can of shaving cream in a bookcase.
What the heck?
I put it under the bathroom sink.
I my mind I can already hear the outrage.
“Who moved my shaving cream?”
Today my adult ESL students were discussing going to the movies.
I broke them into pairs to have a conversation.
Student 1: Would you like to meet me at 5:00 in the evening to see a movie?
Student 2: 5:00 o’clock is not evening. 5:00 o’clock is afternoon.
Me: 5:00 can be called afternoon or evening. Both are OK.
2: 5:00 is afternoon.
Me: You can say that 5:00 is too early, and you would prefer to meet later.
2: 5:00 O’CLOCK IS AFTERNOON!
Yeah, I’m guessing this guy doesn’t get too many invitations.