Categories
Writing Your Life Story

How To Get Out Of The Emergency Room Quickly

Emergency Room

I wasn’t planning on spending Labor Day weekend in the Emergency Room.

Although, to be truthful, the Grown Son wasn’t planning on spending it with a dislocated shoulder, either.

But that’s exactly where we found ourselves.

It’s been a long time since I’ve been to an emergency room.

Apparently, everyone else had the same idea.

It was packed.

We settled in for a very, very, very long wait.

I’d brought a book.

I figured I had plenty of time to read.

But then, less than an hour later, they were done.

Done.

And they apologized for the wait.

The wait.

In an emergency room.

I barely had time to read a chapter.

Not that I’m complaining.

Hopefully, I’ll never need an emergency room again.

But if I do?

I know where I’m going.

Medical City.

And next time, I’m bringing a shorter book.

Categories
Family

No More Slumber Parties

No More Slumber Parties

Long ago, I put a stop to my sons’ sleepovers.

I had to.

It’s because boys are dumb.

I’m sorry, but it’s true.

“Hey, watch this,” and “Dude, look what I can do,” proves my point.

It always ends badly.

Groups of boys are significantly dumber than solitary boys.

The dumbness grows exponentially in the wee hours of the night.

The collective dumbness of a group of boys late at night is significantly greater than the sum of their individual parts during daylight hours.

I know.

I have the emergency room bills to prove it.

No more slumber parties.