This Is Why I Need To Pay Attention

Mostly True Memoirs

Pay attention

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Pay Attention!

I need to pay attention.

It was entirely my fault.

The Grown Son has a right to be mad.

We live on a triangle-shaped lot.

Which means we have a big back yard.

And absolutely no parking in front.

Every night we have to tetris the cars into the driveway.

My car is the smallest, so it’s always blocked.

Someone has to move their car so I can get out.

Yesterday morning, I wanted to go to the gym.

But I didn’t want to wake up the Grown Son too early.

I waited until 9:00.

He grumbled and complained, but he got up to move his car.

Only to discover that it wasn’t his car blocking mine.

It was his brother’s car.

He was furious that I had woken him up for no reason.

I was furious because the other son had been awake for hours, and I could have been to the gym and back by this time.

If only I had been paying attention.

Now I’m doing the Grown Son’s laundry.

To atone for my sin of waking him up too early on a Sunday morning.

I guess that’s fair.

Next time I’ll pay attention.

Liz Brenner

Everyone has a story to tell.

Even you.

Especially you.




Funny Parenting Stories

Mostly True Memoirs

Funny parenting stories

Think You’ve Heard All of the Funny Parenting Stories?

Think you’ve heard all of the funny parenting stories?

Here’s one about lice.


Someone was recently speaking about it, and it made me laugh.

One of my kids brought home lice once.

It was awful.

But I have boys, so it was pretty easy to get rid of it.

I shaved their heads.

My older boy has very dark hair, so even with a buzz cut he had a dark cap.

My little guy was blond back in the day.

He looked goofy with a shaved head, but he didn’t care.

I told him that he doesn’t need to discuss the lice with his kindergarten class.

It’s nothing to be ashamed of.

It’s just private.

He had to be inspected by the school nurse before he was allowed back in class.

Of course, that meant that we were late.

He made a Grand Entrance into his classroom and declared loudly, “I have lice!”

So much for discretion.

All the kids oohed and aahed.

By the end of the day, all the kids wanted to have lice.

They all wanted a buzz cut too.

Even the girls.

Yep, the kid was a trendsetter, even back in kindergarten.